I'm in C math tutorial room now.. The test will be later.. But I can't even think straight. Argh! I'm trying not to think of him but.. Haiz.. I have to try.. Come on Shahirah, you can do it.. Can I avoid this love? The love that I have been avoiding for a year.. Only now that it's unbearable.. Why now? Why?? I'm happy that I'm living my own life.. BUT God, Love is killing me slowly. But if I get rejected, I will be hurt. It's like having a knife stuck in the chest. Gosh.. I so want to be loved but that doesn't mean that I want a serious relationship. I want to take it slow. Let nature takes its course..

I'm becoming insane.. In fact, more insane. It's like being casted on a spell.. Oh.. I just don't want to walk through the garden of love. Walking through it will just kill me bit by bit. I want someone but its up to that someone to make the decision. I just pray silently hoping that my broken heart will be mended by him. Haiz.. Millions of sigh and it will not change things. Millions of tears will not change thoughts. Only the heart will understand what it feels like when love is not accepted.